


Baby Boy GC

by SolarArmageddon



Series: chat fics [1]
Category: ATEEZ (Band), ITZY (Band), NCT (Band), Red Velvet (K-pop Band), Stray Kids (Band), TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Bad Parenting, Crack, Crack Relationships, De-Aged Characters, Established Relationship, Fluff and Crack, Huang Ren Jun & Lee Donghyuck | Haechan & Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas Are Best Friends, Huang Ren Jun & Lee Donghyuck | Haechan Are Best Friends, Huang Ren Jun & Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas Are Best Friends, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Multi, Nonbinary Character, Nonbinary Park Jisung, Polyamory, Polyamory Negotiations, Pre-Poly, Slurs, Step-parents, Step-siblings, Swearing, Texting, This Is STUPID, Trans Character, Trans Na Jaemin, but mostly everyone just uses them both and switches between em, chat fic, every1 calls lucas by xuxi or yukhei, hyuck and mark call him xuxi mostly, johnny and mark are brothers, kun is chenles brother/parental figure ig, so much swearing otherwise i wouldn't tag it lol, they/them pronouns for jisung
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2019-08-17
Packaged: 2019-09-14 15:57:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16915875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SolarArmageddon/pseuds/SolarArmageddon
Summary: Donghyuck makes a group chat and promptly names it 'baby boy gc', everyone hates him.





	1. one

**Author's Note:**

> akk i almost named this fags unite but i didn't want anyone getting pissed over this lmao anyways disclaimer i probably will use fag a lot cause uhh,, big gay here and i use it a lot irl cause all my friends are also gay and love saying it sorry  
> also for jisung and using they/them pronouns ill probably accidentally use he/him sometimes so if it happens and its not like,, explained or smth its an accident sorry
> 
> mm last thing?? grades bc everyone is slightly younger cause i said so,,  
> mark is 11th, renjun, hyuck, jeno and jaemin are in 10th, chenle and jisung is in 9th
> 
> names:  
> mark - xuxis other baby  
> renjun - buttercup  
> donghyuck - xuxis baby  
> chenle - pussy is god  
> jeno - bubbles  
> jaemin - blossom  
> jisung - munchkin  
> yukhei - justin bieber except hot

_**xuxis baby** added **xuxis other baby, buttercup, pussy is god, bubbles, blossom** and **munchkin** to the chat!_

_**xuxis baby** has changed the group chat name to **baby boy gc**!_

 

 **blossom:** what the fuck is this

 **munchkin:** i second that

 **xuxis baby:** hey

 **xuxis baby:** have i ever told you guys that i love

 **xuxis baby:** and i mean LOVE

 **buttercup:** yes, you love yukhei and mark, we know you love wong yukhei and mark lee so much, theyre the lights of your life, you love them so much, you just love yukhei and mark, we KNOW, you love mark and yukhei you fucking love mark and yukhei ok we know, we get it, YOU LOVE YUKHEI AND MARK. WE GET IT.

 **xuxis baby:** actually i was gonna say i love YOU, renjun,

 **bubbles:** oh mood

 **xuxis baby:** but never fucking mind.

 **bubbles:** nvm not a mood

 **buttercup:** aw wait hyuck ilyt 

 **blossom:** again, what the f u c k is this

 **pussy is god:** i second that

 **munchkin:** i third that

 **xuxis baby:** the better question is why is your name pussy is god when you don't even like pussy

 **pussy is god:** bc pussy is god by king princess fucked me up, now answer the question hoebag

 **xuxis baby:** i realized we're all baby boys and i really wanted us to have a gc bc its easier than texting yall indivually so i made this baby boy gc

 **xuxis other baby:** wym im not a baby boy

 **xuxis baby:** honey look at your user

 **xuxis other baby:** i didn't do that though :(( xuxi did

 **xuxis baby:** ik but you still haven't changed it sooo

 **xuxis other baby:** i don't want to make him sad

 **xuxis baby:** mood

 **bubbles:** okay but why did you make a gc just to tell us you love renjun

 **xuxis baby:** oh yeah!! he took notes for me in math when i passed out so i wanted everyone to know hes the loml and im breaking up with mark whos never taken notes for me before

 **xuxis other baby:** because we don't have the same classes?? cause im in a different grade????

 **xuxis other baby:** also what abt yukhei

 **_xuxis baby_ ** _added_ **_justin bieber except hot_ ** _to the chat!_

 **xuxis baby:** can we break up with mark and date renjun instead?

 **xuxis baby** : he gives me notes and kisses my cheeks vv softly uwu

 **justin bieber except hot:** yeah!! anything you want babe

 **xuxis baby:** okey doke ily

 **_xuxis baby_ ** _removed_ **_justin bieber except hot_ ** _from the chat!_

 **blossom:** uh what about me

 **bubbles:** and me

 **munchkin:** akk imagine forgetting your best friend is also taken

 **xuxis baby:** who said i forgot

 **xuxis baby:** i just don't care

 **buttercup:** HAHAHKDJDALSK i love you but id rather die than date your ass sry

 **buttercup:** idk how mark and yukhei are even still alive holy shit

 **munchkin:** idk how hyuck isn't dead i feel like mark should've killed him by now

 **xuxis baby:** wow fuck yall

 **xuxis other baby:** ive tried before

 **xuxis other baby:** somehow it just never works

 **pussy is god:** oooh details

 **munchkin:** chenle what the fuck

 **xuxis other baby:** i almost suffocated him in his sleep once but yukhei walked in and stopped me

 **xuxis baby:** BITCH I THOUGHT THAT WAS A DREAM WHAT THEF UCKCUH

 **xuxis baby:** further proof that xuxi is the best thing thats happened to me and mark is trash

 **pussy is god:** is there any other times

 **xuxis other baby:** a few but most went just about the same

 **xuxis baby:** so my frequent dreams about being suffocated are actually just my boyfriend trying to kill me okay what great newws

 **munchkin:** tbh a few of those times were probably also me

 **munchkin:** you talk inyour sleep and its fuckn obnoxious

 **xuxis other baby:** ikr

 **xuxis other baby:** yukhei thinks its cute which like?? h o w

 **xuxis other baby:** i cant sleep with him bc of it

 **xuxis baby:** sorry your a light sleeper asshole

 **xuxis baby:** this is why im gonna date renjun

 **buttercup:** no youre not

 **bubbles:** no youre not

 **blossom:** no youre not

 **xuxis other baby:** no youre not

 **munchkin:** i feel pressured to also say it soooo

munchkin: no youre not

 **pussy is god:** same so no youre not

 **xuxis baby:** FUCK


	2. two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess whos dumbass broke their keyboard?? me  
> or like,, technically my dog but whatever. he knocked a container of soy sauce onto it and half the keys weren't working but its fine now??? it wasn't working until a few hours ago idk what happened that made it start working again but idc really either  
> anyways sup im on break finally and im hype to get some shit for Christmas!! heres a trashy chapter as an early gift ig
> 
> mark - xuxis other baby  
> renjun - buttercup  
> donghyuck - xuxis baby  
> chenle - pussy is god  
> jeno - bubbles  
> jaemin - blossom  
> jisung - munchkin

**[Chat: baby boy gc]**

**buttercup:** ...so what did yall get me for Christmas

 **pussy is god:** nobody tell him shit

 **xuxis baby:** chenle got you a jesus advent calendar from that crafts shop that always kicks us out 10mins into shopping for being "disruptive", a can of spotted dick pudding he found in jenos pantry and a jesus night light from the Walmart clearance bin when we went to go buy Halloween shit

**pussy is god:**

**pussy is god:** IM GONNA FUCK YOUR BITCH ASS UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **xuxis baby:** you don't scare me bitch square the fuck up

 **bubbles:** he scares me :((((

 **bubbles:** also I was wondering where that spotted dick went!!

 **buttercup:** baby why did you need it

 **bubbles:** I was gonna give it to hyuck as a Christmas gift tbh

 **xuxis baby:** I deserve better than this

 **xuxis other baby:** do you really?

 **xuxis other baby:** also yukhei is gonna spoil you no matter what so stfu

 **xuxis baby:** you act like he treats me better than he does you like,,,,

 **xuxis baby:** you do realize you're ALSO gonna get spoiled here right?? this isn't just a me thing??????

 **xuxis other baby:** ,,,

 **xuxis other baby:** fuck you

 **buttercup:** anyways what else am I getting

 **munchkin:** I got you the my little pony equestria girls movie

 **munchkin:** I cant remember which one it is but probably the first one tbh

 **munchkin:** also some fairy lights uwu

 **buttercup:** I love you so much why are you my favorite person ever

 **buttercup:** jeno, jaemin, our relationship is cancelled jisung is my new datemate

 **munchkin:** uwuwuwuwuwu

 **bubbles:** yeah id break up with us too if jisung was the other option

 **blossom:** yeah same

 **pussy is god:** I may be aro but,, same

 **bubbles:** anyways tho you don't get to know what im getting you yet jun sorry baby

 **buttercup:** :((((((((((((

 **bubbles:** no stoooop

 **buttercup:** :((((((((((((((((((((((

 **bubbles:** baby please im a weak man you know this

 **xuxis baby:** lol "man"

 **buttercup:** :((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

 **bubbles:** fuck fine just stop :(((

 **buttercup:** :))

 **bubbles:** I got you a shit ton of nail polish and makeup shit (ty hyuck for the help) and a few croptops and maybeee a skirt or two??? also bought you an album or two and new stationary shit for when we go back to school cause I keep forgetting to give yours back after classes end

 **buttercup:** nvm jisung im taking one boyfriend back

 **blossom:** I best be getting this much shit too wtf

 **bubbles:** dw you are!!

 **xuxis other baby:** damn I need a freak like that

 **munchkin:** you already have two shut the hell up

 **munchkin:** also hi does anyone wanna come over tomorrow to make cookies? my mom wanted to me to ask now before I forgot

 **munchkin:** ive had three bags of cookie mix in my cupboard since that school dance cause,, ya know

 **xuxis baby:** im still mad abt that I was so excited to eat your sugar cookies and you brought in fucking store bought ones u lazy ass

 **munchkin:** I mean theyre still technically gonna be store bought cookies the only difference is that I have to cook them myself everything else is outta bag

 **xuxis baby:** whatever!! not the point!!!!

 **buttercup:** omg shut up about the fuckn cookies already donghyuck we get it

 **buttercup:** also yes ill come over tomorrow, what time?

 **munchkin:** idk like,, 1?

 **buttercup:** okay :)

 **blossom:** ill be there also & Im taking jeno

 **xuxis baby:** I can go but ill need to get a ride from yukhei and you know if I do he'll be coming too

 **xuxis other baby:** yeah ill also b with yukhei fyi

 **xuxis other baby:** cause otherwise its getting a ride with johnny and hes literally the worst driver idk how anyone trusts him or how he got his license

 **munchkin:** that's fine, my mom loves yukhei anyways

 **munchkin:** also johnny isn't that bad youre just a pussy oop

 **xuxis baby:** THANK YOU

 **xuxis baby:** also literally who doesn't love yukhei

 **pussy is god:** me

 **xuxis other baby:** that's bs and you know it I have videos of you acting like he was the coolest dude ever when he first transferred schools and started talking to you just bc he barely knew korean

 **pussy is god:** mayhaps I was caught

 **pussy is god:** anyways ill be there

 **buttercup:** now that that's settled what else did yall get me??

 **xuxis baby:** I think that's enough spoilers for you

 **xuxis other baby:** hes just saying that bc he still hasn't shopped for anyone besides me and xuxi

 **xuxis baby:** listen I procrastinate everything even if I do love shopping im gonna put it off for ages

 **xuxis baby:** I also don't wanna go alone with my mom shes,, a lot

 **bubbles:** we know

 **bubbles:** that woman scares the shit out of me

 **xuxis baby:** how do you think I feel

 **xuxis other baby:** just go with xuxi you know he'll take you whenever

 **xuxis baby:** yeah ik but hes got shit to do too so I don't wanna bother him with it :((

 **xuxis baby:** ill just take the bus and go like,, tomorrow after I leave jisungs or smth

 **blossom:** honestly you don't need to get me shit just give me like,, a hug or some free cuddle sessions and ill be happy

 **xuxis baby:** uwu youll get that too but im gonna buy yall something dw

 **pussy is god:** I mean if that's what you wanna do im not gonna object but im p sure none of us actuallt care if we get shit tbh

 **pussy is god:** like its just stuff it don't mean that much

 **buttercup:** yeah don't worry baby!! if you cant get anything its okay!!!

 **xuxis baby:** ugh shut up yall im buying you shit and that's final okay?

 **munchkin:** I mean sure ig

 **pussy is god:** okay

 **blossom:** okay

 **bubbles:** okay

 **buttercup:** if that's really what you want then okay

 **xuxis other baby:** and since I know you already got me shit you cant get me any more, k? same with xuxi

 **xuxis baby:** yeah whatever loser

 **xuxis baby:** now shut up, I love you guys but its late and I cant look pretty unless I get at least 8 hours of sleep, you guys are already cutting into my time


	3. three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im on my renhyuck bs rn so I wanna highkey delete this and change the pairings but im lazy and wont do that bc I still like markhyuckhei anyways lol  
> anyways ive been highkey stressed bc I have many projects due and a workshop to set up for two weeks from now so idk if ill update anytime soon? so sorry in advance if I disappear for like,,,,, ages ig. I wanted to update now tho bc ive had this idea for a few weeks cause it relates to my stray kids chat fic which im putting in the same universe as that one cause im trash and want this fuckery to happen. lets rollllll
> 
> mark - xuxis other baby/mork  
> renjun - buttercup  
> donghyuck - xuxis baby/hyuckie  
> chenle - pussy is god  
> jeno - bubbles  
> jaemin - blossom  
> jisung - munchkin  
> yukhei - xuxi uwu

**[Chat: baby boy gc]**

**xuxis other baby:** sometimes I rmember my brother has 3 boyfriends and I becoe

 **xuxis other baby:** ENRAGED

 **xuxis baby:** jesus how much have you slept hun

 **xuxis other baby:** uh

 **xuxis other baby:** I took a nap on the way to jenos this morning???

 **bubbles:** babe that was like,, a 10 minutes drive and you were like,, still half awake tbh

 **xuxis baby:** ugh I love my stupid insomniac bf

 **xuxis baby:** come over and take a nap with me

 **xuxis other baby:** okay ill be over in 20 but

 **xuxis other baby:** still?? hes such a fuckn loser how did he get 3 actually attractive and nice boyfriends

 **pussy is god:** and hes working on a fourth :/

 **xuxis other baby:** ?

 **pussy is god:** kun

 **pussy is god:** he wont shut up abt it and its,, annoying

 **xuxis other baby:** that actually makes sense im not surprised

 **xuxis other baby:** anyways! my point is how does he get so many good boyfriends? its unfair and I want more of my own

 **xuxis baby:** we could always go bf shopping lol

 **xuxis baby:** hold on lemme just,,

**_xuxis baby_ ** _added_ **_ justin bieber except hot  _ ** _ to the chat! _

**xuxis baby:** mark wants a new bf I thought you should be here to discuss :)

**_ justin bieber except hot  _ ** _ changed their name to _ **_ xuxi uwu _ **

**xuxi uwu:** okay!

**buttercup:** yall its 2pm im tryna go back to sleep take this to your own chat p l e a s e

 **xuxis baby:** sorry junnie

**[Chat: fag trio]**

**hyuckie:** okay so who do we have in mind here, need a list of pros and cons w/ a picture just in case I cant remember who they are

**mork:**

**mork:** xiaojun!! pros: pretty as hell, seems sweet?? cons: I literally know nothing about him and everytime we talk its all awkward n shit, plus idk if hes actually gay and even if he is he might have something with this other kid in our grade idk

 **xuxi uwu:** yeah I think hes dating this other kid but everytime ive talked to him it was to drag some other kid in chinese soooo

**mork:**

**mork:** yangyang!! pros: also cute and seems sweet, also your age hyuckie!!, but again for the cons: none of us really know much abt him and its real awkward when we talk?? I dont think hes taken tho

 **xuxi uwu:** no he is, next

 **hyuckie:** damn I liked him

 **xuxi uwu:** you literally dont know him

 **hyuckie:** and once I literally didn't know you

 **xuxi uwu:** ...

 **mork:** moving on,,

**mork:**

**hyuckie:** Seungmin is my fave boy but thats a fat no

 **mork:** okay,, why

 **hyuckie:** literally a disaster gay,,,, we dont need another one here we needa even it out 2 to 2

 **xuxi uwu:** good point

 **xuxi uwu:** ive literally seen him cry over how pretty boys in our school are on numerous occasions like srsly hes a mess

 **mork:** okay next one then

**mork:**

**mork:** felix??

 **hyuckie:** ugh loml, so pretty, would die for him,,,but highkey another disaster gay

 **mork:** really?? ive only talked to him a few times but he seemed pretty fine

 **hyuckie:** you've never seen him around the other disaster gays he hangs out with, thats when it really comes out

 **xuxi uwu:** so whos left?

 **hyuckie:** how about jeongin? biggest baby boy ever, so cute, and jisungs said he thinks we're all hot so

 **mork:** seriously?

 **xuxi uwu:** wait our jisung or han jisung

 **hyuckie:** han

 **hyuckie:** and, mark, remind me to show you when you get here, I have screenshots from jisung

 **xuxi uwu:** wait guys I would literally die for jeongin and ive only talked to him a handful of times

 **hyuckie:** I only have a few classes with him but hes so,,, uwu

 **hyuckie:** I want to spoil the shit out of him

 **hyuckie:** idc if he is a lowkey disaster gay hes my fave disaster

 **mork:** \+ hes only a lowkey disaster so we could manage??

 **xuxi uwu:** youre right

 **hyuckie:** its settled then.

**[Chat: baby boy gc]**

**_xuxis baby c_ ** _hanged the chat name to_ **_markhyuckhein rise_ **

**munchkin:** I think you misspelled your ship name?

 **xuxis other baby:** tsk tsk tsk no jisung

 **xuxis baby:** mark/hyuck/xuxi/jeongin

 **xuxis baby:** our next bf has been decided to be yang jeongin! we still dont have specifics figured out but we chose him after going through our selection process

 **blossom:** this is why I hate being alive


	4. four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im supposed to be doing portfolio work in science rn but whatever  
> this chapter is a mess oof
> 
> mark - xuxis other baby/meowth  
> renjun - buttercup  
> donghyuck - xuxis baby/jessie  
> chenle - pussy is god  
> jeno - bubbles  
> jaemin - blossom  
> jisung - munchkin  
> yukhei - xuxi uwu/james

**[Chat: baby boy gc]**

**pussy is god:** just now realizing this but??

**pussy is god:** its gonna be w a c k when ot4 and kun start dating

**xuxis other baby:** ur right

**xuxis other baby:** what if they get married

**pussy is god:** i dont want to be apart of your family stop

**bubbles:** yall its 2am wtf

**pussy is god:** also like i highkey don't want kun to have all his boyfriends at our house constantly

**xuxis other baby:** how do you think i fuckn feel, they hog the tv and make so much noise

**xuxis other baby:** jaehyun literally never cleans up after himself and ive seen ten come out of johnnys room naked at lest 3 times this week already

**pussy is god:** i swear if they start doing that at my place im rioting

**xuxis baby:** why dont you guys just stay at chenles and then have ot5 stay at marks

**xuxis other baby:** ...

**xuxis other baby:** this is why i love you uwu

**xuxis baby:** uwu

**xuxis baby:** you may be saying that now but you wont be in 2 seconds lol

**xuxis other baby:** what why

**_xuxis baby_ ** _changed_ **_xuxi uwu's_ ** _user to_ **_james_ **

_**xuxis baby** changed their user to **jessie**_

_**xuxis baby** changed **xuxis other baby's** user to **meowth** _

**buttercup: LMAO**

**meowth:** i fucking hate you

**meowth:** why am i meowth

**meowth:** also why can we never be cute like the other three idiots?? theyre the fuckn powerpuff girls and you make us fucking t e a m r o c k e t

**buttercup:** i was attacked

**jessie:** team rocket is cool youre just mad that i get to be jessie and you dont

**meowth:** no

**jessie:** yes

**james:** yes

**meowth:** why do you guys always gang up on me :(

**jessie:** bc youre a bitch ass liar

**blossom:** listen this is funny and all but ITS 2AM

**munchkin:** no wait tho kun and ot4 are already basically dating?? and johnny and kun already act like our parents isnt them dating like,, not really changing anything

**pussy is god:** that isn’t the point!!

**bubbles:** whats the point then

**meowth:** the point is that them being together will 1) make them more parental if anything and theyre already fucking ridiculous

**meowth:** 2) now its not just my problem, its chenles which means you guys have to listen to both of us complain

**meowth:** 3) idk its fuckn weird when one of your best friend’s brother starts dating your brother????

**pussy is god:** exactly like it couldve been anyone why ot4

**pussy is god:** why couldnt kun just,, be simple and have one bf who wasnt related to one of my best friends

**munchkin:** i think yall are freakn for nothing but whatever ig

**munchkin:** have fun with that im gonna go to bed now

**pussy is god:** okay :(

**pussy is god:** night bab

**meowth:** night sungie

**jessie:** night baby!!

**blossom:** night

**blossom:** jeno and renjun say goodnight as well

**james:** night jisung :)

**_pussy is god_ ** _removed_ **_munchkin_ ** _f_ _rom the chat_

**pussy is god:** NOW as I was saying,

**pussy is god:** kun having 4 other bfs is gonna drive me insane, im terrified, mark move in with me now so we can kick them out and live peacfully

**meowth:** only if you help me move my rock collection

**pussy is god:** deal

**jessie:** wow my bf moves in with a 12 year old before he moves in with me

**pussy is god:** im going to skin you


	5. five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its been awhile but whatever ig  
> ive just been busy and writing chat fics is only something i can do if i have time to format everything and actually dont feeldead so i can make jokes lol
> 
> mark - meowth  
> renjun - buttercup  
> donghyuck - jessie  
> chenle - pussy is god  
> jeno - bubbles  
> jaemin - blossom  
> jisung - munchkin

**[Chat: baby boy gc]**

**meowth:** i just had an 8th grader ask me out

 **meowth:** in the middle of fucking NEWSPAPER CLUB

 **meowth:** I LITERALLY HATE BEING ALIVE????

 **buttercup:** honestly tho that was the highlight of my day holy shit

 **pussy is god:** deets pls

 **munchkin:** oh? tea???

 **blossom:** ,, i hate tea still

 **blossom:** i dont think you even used that right

 **munchkin:** thats why i use it

 **blossom:** okay okay anyways

 **blossom:** so picture this

 **blossom:** mark is mid speech about the next issue and what we needa get done by the end of the week

 **blossom:** and this LITERAL FUCKING CHILD

 **blossom:** LIKE /LITERALLY/ LIKE 5'3" TOPS WITH THE BABIEST OF BABY FACES, BRACE FACED N ALL

 **blossom:** SIS BOLTS INTO THE ROOM

 **blossom:** SLIDES OVER A GODDAMN TABLE AND NEARLY KICKS SOOBIN IN THE FACE

 **blossom:** AND THEN THROWS

 **blossom:** and when i say THROWS i mean he literally SLID OVER THAT TABLE and RIGHT ONTO HIS KNEES in front of mark

 **meowth:** WHICH ALSO WAS TERRIFYING I SWEAR TO GOD I NEARLY PISSED MYSELF WHEN HE GRABBED MY FUCKING PANT LEG AND STARTED TALKING ABOUT LOVE AS IF HE AINT LIKE 4 YEARS OLD

 **buttercup:** okay okay but then you literally said, and i quote, "may i help you?" IN THE MOST MONOTONE VOICE

 **buttercup:** WHILE LOOKING LIKE YOU WERE ABOUT TO FUCKING FAINT

 **meowth:** i felt like i was gonna okay

 **meowth:** like i was .2 seconds away from just passing the fuck out right there

 **blossom:** AND THIS KID THO??? BALLS OF STEEL I STG PULLS A PACKET OF GUMMY WORMS FROM HIS BACK POCKET AND HOLDS THEM UP TO MARK WHILE ON ONE KNEE AND PRACTICALLY SCREECHES A CONFESSION

 **buttercup:** SKAKJS AND AT THIS POINT HAN FUCKING JISUNG FALLS BACK IN HIS CHAIR WHILE W H E E Z I N G

 **buttercup:** YEJI IS IN THE CORNER LOSING HER SHIT AND TRYING NOT TO PHYSICALLY CRY AND YERI HAS CURLED UP INTO A BALL AT HER FEET WHILE JUST SHAKING PROFUSELY AND I CANT TELL IF SHE WAS LAUGING OR CRYING

 **buttercup:** YEONJUN HAS LITERALLY STARTED SCREECHING INTO SOOBINS SHOULDER AT THIS POINT

 **buttercup:** KEEP IN MIND WE HAVE 0 SUPERVISION TODAY BECAUSE ALL 12TH GRADERS ARE ON A TRIP AND CANT LEAD CLUBS BC OF IT

 **buttercup:** AND SEONGHWA HAS LEFT MARK IN CHARGE BUT MARK IS LITERALLY ABOUT TO JUST DIE OF EMBARASSMENT OR SOME SHIT

 **buttercup:** AND THIS WENT ON FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES WHERE EVERYONE JUST LOST THEIR SHIT AND MARK STOOD THERE WHILE THIS KID KEPT SAYING SHIT TO TRY AND CONVINCE HIM TO DATE HIM AJSJSJD

 **buttercup:** JONGHO LITERALLY HAD TO LEAVE THE ROOM BECAUSE HE COULDNT STOP LAUGHING AND WAS ABOUTTA HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK

 **meowth:** i feel bad for the kid but also this wouldve been fucking hilarious if i hadnt had been on the receiving end of the confession

 **jessie:** okay but like,, howd you get him to stop lmao

 **blossom:** oh thats the best part

 **blossom:** after that like 10 minutes of just awkwardly trying to interrupt this kid as he rambles mark finally screams "I DONT THINK MY BOYFRIENDS WOULD LIKE THAT" and then just fucking RUNS OUT OF THE ROOM

 **blossom:** i have literally NEVER

 **blossom:** AND I MEAN NEVER

 **blossom:** seen mark run that fucking fast

 **buttercup:** and the kid still stayed in the room for like 5 minutes afterwards while everyone was still trying not to laugh and failing miserably

 **buttercup:** and jeno has been gone this entire fucking time making copies of a list everyone needed

 **buttercup:** so he comes back in and the whole room jyst goes fucking silent before the kid yells "I FUCKING HATE MEN" AND SHOVES JENO INTO THE DOOR FRAME AS HE RUNS OUT???

 **buttercup:** AND JENO ISNT EVEN MAD HE JUST SAYS "what did i miss?" AND STARTS HANDING OUT PAPERS WHILE EVERYONE IS STILL WHEEZING AND TRYING TO YELL OUT THE STORY AT THE SAME TIME

 **bubbles:** honestly,, it was terrible and i still wasn't clear about what went on til now so thanks

 **jessie:** god i wish i had been there

 **jessie:** do you think seonghwa would let me in the club or is it too late

 **pussy is god:** that sounds like a horrible idea all your articles would be about how youre gay and love your bfs and thats it

 **munchkin:** id buy that

 **munchkin:** nothing like a good wholesome article about loving ur bfs uwu

 **jessie:** jisung is the only bitch i trust

 **munchkin:** !!!

 **bubbles:** anyways now that that is over

 **bubbles:** my mom wants to know when yall are coming over so she can set up borthday stuff

 **jessie:** im at hyunjins rn but he said we can head over whenever is best

 **meowth:** yeah yukhei said the same

 **meowth:** n we're taking chenle and jisung so

 **buttercup:** min and me will be over in 20!! but we wanna b early so

 **bubbles:** k my ma said since jaemin and renjun are coming over soon yall should b here in like an hour or so

 **bubbles:** ill tell everyone else to be here a bit after that cause i wanna spend time with my faves first

 **bubbles:** and hyunjin ig

 **jessie:** AKSJSJ HE SAID FUCK YOU TOO BTW

 **bubbles:** tell him thanks but im good uwu

 **jessie:** i refuse to be in the middle of this argument so he saided hed pm you lmao

 **bubbles** : gucci

 **bubbles:** now bfs get here so i can smooch

 **buttercup:** okay baby

 **blossom:** omw

 **pussy is god:** wait wait wait

 **pussy is god:** back track

 **pussy is god:** did mark actually take the gummies

 **blossom:** no but uh,, i sure as hell did

 **pussy is god:** SJAJSJK


	6. six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> uh idk abt this i have little motivation for writing tbh but i??? am here. and this is short and bad.
> 
> mark - meowth  
> renjun - buttercup  
> donghyuck - jessie  
> chenle - pussy is god  
> jeno - bubbles  
> jaemin - blossom  
> jisung - munchkin

**[Chat: baby boy gc]**

**pussy is god:** ten wants me to add him to the chat

 **pussy is god:** yay or neigh

 **jessie:** this ten rn

**jessie:**

**pussy is god:** ajaks true

 **pussy is god:** anyways

 **buttercup:** big fuckn neign

 **bubbles:** what he want

 **buttercup:** our souls

 **blossom:** our drama

 **meowth:** mostly the drama tbh

 **munchkin:** literally just wants drama

 **pussy is god:** so,, neigh??

 **meowth:** neigh

 **meowth:** from all of us

**_pussy is god_ ** _added_ **_twink of the year_ **

**meowth:** fuck you whore

 **pussy is god:** he said he wouldn't leave the house until i added him and i want kun to cook dinner already oop

 **twink of the year:** ya know i just came to say hi and that i love yall but fuck you mark i regret everything

 **meowth:** oh fuck off you woke me up at 3am rooting around my fuckn kitchen and stealing my goddamn waffles

 **twink of the year:** YOU DONT PAY FOR SHIT BITCH

 **meowth:** YEAH BUT MY MA DOES AND ITS MY FUCKING HOUSE???

 **jessie:** yall sound like2 year olds stfu

 **buttercup:** like you have room to talk with your fucking "i go to renjuns house just to play with his lizards all night"

 **jessie:** you dont either mr "i like to have sleepovers at my dearest hyuckies house just to steal his fruit leather"

 **munchkin:** why do i always feel like im the most mature one here

 **bubbles:** lbr you are

 **pussy is god:** i regret my whole damn life i should've just made my own dinner and avoided this all

 **blossom:** YOU FUCKING THINK???


	7. seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhh its been a hot minute sorry bout that but ill try and update more frequently from now on hehe, heres some stupid shit i thought of while listening to bad boy by andres aksjsjs
> 
> mark - mork  
> renjun - wannabe eboy  
> donghyuck - babie eboy/hyuckie  
> yukhei - actual eboy/xuxi uwu

**[Chat: eboy hell]**

**babie eboy:** okay okay renjun

 **babie eboy:** hypothetically speaking,,,

 **babie eboy:** if i told u me and yuk got some shit pierced without telling anyone

 **babie eboy:** how would you react?

 **wannabe eboy:** okay um

 **wannabe eboy:** 1) why are you asking me

 **wannabe eboy:** 2) what piercings

 **wannabe eboy:** 3) is mark included in the "anyone"

 **wannabe eboy:** 4) and dont say hypothetically if you already fucking did it

 **actual eboy:** we havent done it yet!

 **actual eboy:** but we boutta kajsjsk

 **actual eboy:** we outside the shop rn

 **babie eboy:** we figured we'd ask u bc youre least likely to lose your shit and also tell us if its a bad idea

 **babie eboy:** also bc we wanna do it but dont want mark to know rn ig

 **wannabe eboy:** why dont you want mark to know? its not like hes ever cared before

 **actual eboy:** itd be like a cool surprise! hehe

 **babie eboy:** except maybe not bc yuk wants a tongue piercing n i wanna get my nipples pierced but like,,,

 **babie eboy:** 1) i feel like mark would care abt these ones

 **babie eboy:** 2) and if we did get them idk how we'd tell him

 **wannabe eboy:** what fucking sketchy place r yall even going to this time damn

 **wannabe eboy:** like i dont think theyre gonna pierce shit without an adult unless the place is really fuckn sketch

 **babie eboy:** i mean it kinda is sketch but im not too worried abt it

 **babie eboy:**  also yuk passes as an adult! and i sorta can,,

 **actual eboy:** plus xiaojun and yangyang both got shit done there and nothing bad happened!

 **wannabe eboy:** you barely know them what if theyre lying

 **actual eboy:** what would they get outta that?

 **wannabe eboy:** i dont fucking know! but thats not my point!!!

 **babie eboy:** omg sketchiness aside is it a bad idea to get them done and then just not tell mark until he just finds out on his own orrr

 **wannabe eboy:** yes!! its definitely a bad idea!!!!

 **wannabe eboy:** i honestly dont think he'll care cause its yalls choice in the end and he doesnt wanna control what you guys do but you should just tell him anyways

 **wannabe eboy:** dont just let him find out on accident or smth

 **wannabe eboy:** like?? itd be weird and hed probably be upset then

 **wannabe eboy:** also like yukhei you cant kiss anyone for like 3 weeks so youd have to explain anyways

 **actual eboy:** ik :(

 **actual eboy:** thats the only negative

 **wannabe eboy:** ya know the fact that it doesnt surprise me that youre more worried abt not being able to kiss ur bfs and not the fact that it could get infected or something could go wrong when its being pierced is sad

 **babie eboy:** okay but like if something goes wrong that sucks but at least id b able to kiss my baby :(

 **wannabe eboy:** except you probably couldnt??? bc that shit would still hurt??????? ur dumb

 **wannabe eboy:** n e ways go talk to ur bf abt this if youre actually gonna do it

 **wannabe eboy:** also,,,mayhaps u could come over afterwards?

 **wannabe eboy:** i havent hung out with yall alone in awhile n i miss my best friends :(

 **actual eboy:** ofc!!! we miss u too junnie hehe

 **babie eboy:** we'll come over regardless of what we do! <3 ily jun akslsks

 **wannabe eboy:** hehe ily2

 **wannabe eboy:** now go talk to ur mans

**[Chat: fag trio]**

**xuxi uwu:** babyyyyy

 **hyuckie:** angellllll

 **xuxi uwu:** sweethearttttttt

 **hyuckie:** my loveeeeeeeeeeeeee

 **mork:** yes dears???

 **hyuckie:** aksjsjs okay me and xuxi r at this piercing place rn and uh

 **xuxi uwu:** we wanna get sum stuff pierced obvs but not like not the normal shit

 **mork** : ???

 **mork:** okay, why r u telling me? you never have before, u just showed me afterwards lmao

 **hyuckie:** id be getting my nipples pierced

 **xuxi uwu:** and id be getting my tongue done

 **mork:** huh

 **mork:** ,,,okay?

 **mork:** i mean its new obviously but i dont really care, its up to yall

 **mork:** just be safe okay? make sure to like,, clean them properly and whatnot pls

 **hyuckie:** of course of course!!!

 **hyuckie:** we just thought we should tell you cause like,,, its different and kinda involves you indirectly

 **hyuckie:** at least xux's does

 **mork:** ?????

 **xuxi uwu:** i cant kiss anyone til it heals :(

 **mork:** :0000

 **mork:** no now im sad :(((((((((

 **mork:** i cant kiss just hyuckie for what??

 **hyuckie:** 3 weeks

 **mork:** 3 weeks! thats unfair and cruel!

 **xuxi uwu:** i mean u can kiss me just dont try and stick ur tongue in my mouth akdjdjs

 **mork:** UNFAIR AND CRUEL

 **hyuckie:** UNFAIR AND CRUEL INDEED

 **xuxi uwu:** soz akjsjs but im gonna do it hehe

 **hyuckie:** rip us

 **mork:** :( whatever

 **mork:** send me pics when its done then <3

 **mork:** or im coming for ur kneecaps!!

 **hyuckie:** yes baby!!

 **xuxi uwu:** yes love <33333


End file.
